A group of girls in one of my classes are always going on about their relationships.  It seems like all they do is complain about their significant others: how inept they are at listening, their lack of commitment, their inability to ever clean out the fridge.  I began to wonder what they actually liked about their boyfriends, and I posed this question to them a few days ago.  I received such answers as “he’s cute,” “he can cook,” “he’s good in bed” (keep that to yourself, really) and the ever-popular “he’s going to buy me a pretty ring.”  These responses not only told me a little about the type of girls I was dealing with, but also made me think a bit about love and what I would like it to be.

I think you should not only love a person for their kindness, understanding, intelligence, looks or sense of humor, but also all of the little aspects of them that really make them different from any other human.  There are millions of kind people, and a pretty face is not difficult to come by.  But not everyone will look at you with just that expression when you do something stupid, or understand your obscure movie references. 

It could be the way their hands look when they are doing something they’re good at, or their particular smell, or the look on their face when they are concentrating especially hard on something.  It could be the way their hand feels in yours, the color of their eyes right after they wake up in the morning, or the way they hum to themselves when they think no one is listening.  Tiny details that maybe no one else notices, things that happen every day but are, to you, special. 

I know that I would want someone to love me for small things as well as large things.  Maybe how I giggle when I have had too much to drink, the style of my handwriting, or the expression on my face when I’m trying hard not to laugh.  In the end, I think that the little things play a huge factor in relationships and memories.  They are the hardest things to change, and the hardest things to forget.   

I’m not suggesting that the aforementioned girls are shallow and don’t have meaningful relationships.  It just seems like maybe they should take some time to count their blessings and realize what a good thing they have, instead of being unsatisfied with a bare ring finger.